Yes, yes, yes the rumours are true!  My little Chinese student is back with a vengeance and ready to work on document 3 for his supervisor!  This means he is ready to work on his third and final essay on business, written in English, in a competent and comprehensible way.  For those of you who are aware of ‘Dr Frank’ I’m sure you’re all very excited to see what he gets up to this time – for those of you who don’t…. well he is the one who boiled eggs in my kettle.  A little further blogness back and you will be able to read of the joy and fun I experienced last time!  Despite all of this I was looking forward to seeing Dr Frank return and waited patiently to collect him from the bus station.  I got him home and he said – “Waiting here Journey, waiting here right now!” as he pointed to the floor where I was to stay put.  Please let me explain that in spite of the fact that ‘Juliette’ is a well known Shakespearean name and the name of the heroine of the greatest love story in the world, Frank is unable to say it and he continues to call me Journey.  I’m happy to go along with this as the stress of trying to get him to say it correctly just isn’t worth it.  Thank God my name isn’t Agamemnon.  Anyway, as I waited, fixed to the floor Dr Frank opened his case and proceeded to remove part of a plant wrapped in a napkin.  “For you” he offered.  “I bring plant from China to make special relations England”

“Thank you Frank ” I replied. “And exactly how did you get this through customs?”

“Ahhh, very difficult, very very problem.  Many police did come and they bring dog to sniff.  I explain them – no not is bad, is plant for my family England.”  This was obviously on the way out because had it been at Heathrow on his way in he would still be in a cell at this point with a very sore bottom!  

” I explain China official I make good the relations China /England with special plant”  

China official say ” Ahhh, good idea.  You take.”  So, here I am with  a re-potted ‘God-knows-what” growing in my window sill.  I will let you know…. Moving on.  The family took Frank to our local garden centre for a cake and a coffee.  Here he began to shout – “Very important my time here to Fuks, fuks, fuksfuks” At this point we were looking around wildly to make sure no one could hear him as a lady nearby said ‘ Good Lord what on earth is that oriental chap saying, how rude!”  

“Frank!  What on earth are you trying to say ?”  “Fuks, fuks on work”  continued Frank.   At this point I am laughing hysterically on the coffee shop sofa, tears streaming down my face, being absolutely no help whatsoever.  I eventually managed to figure out that the word Frank was trying to use was focus.  We made a swift exit from the coffee shop and took Frank back home and gave him a glass of Port.  Frank likes Port as I have told him it is a Gentleman’s drink and it helps him sleep.   After only two small glasses Frank stood up and said “Ooh I go sleep.  Earth-shake” – this means feeling a bit wobbly as I’m not used to alcohol at all and I need to lie down quickly.  I now refer to it as ‘Franks medicine’  Legal chloroform!!