Can you believe it? There I was all ready for a much-needed break after the Inktober fest and what happens? I’ll tell you what: along comes Karma, kicking her frilly skirt with her designer shoes, a full smirk on her face.

“Not so quick to rest, my dear. Uh-Oh -no-no-no,” she said with a waggling of a beautifully manicured fingernail. 

“See, it’s Wednesday and it’s time for Whimsy on a  – yep, that’s right… WHIMSY ON A WEDNESDAY!” 

She makes me sick.

But Then I Was Offered An Apple

As fortune would have it, I decided to attend The Bramley Apple Festival at the weekend. Yes, we do have a festival all about an apple – how terribly English is that? This is the first time I’ve been to it, which is a little bit dreadful of me considering it’s hosted in one of my favourite market towns, Southwell. 

Don’t Upset the Apple Cart

Now, if you reside in Southwell then you pronounce it exactly as you read it.  If you live outside of it, then you pronounce it like this – Suth-Ull.  There’s quite a bit of angsty pants between residents and outsiders on how this should be said. However, even the BBC pronounce the races as Suth-ull races so it’s a difficult one. Much like whether you pronounce scone, scone or scon. It all depends on where you live in this mighty island full of first-world problems just like this. 

The streets are paved with gold

Or so they say. There are supposed to be more millionaires per capita in this part of town than anywhere in the UK. I don’t know if that’s true but I think the Suthullians go along with it. The place is rather fancy pants. The streets are quaint and pretty, the architecture dates back to the 18th century with many listed buildings in conservation areas.  The town is famous for its beautiful Minster, the cathedral church of the diocese. This was built by the Normans in the early part of the 12th century – not long after the Battle of Hastings.  I think Cromwell even sheltered his men and horses here.  There is also the foretelling of Trump becoming president as seen in the work of an old mason.

Southwell Minster is absolutely stunning and is where the main part of the Bramley Apple Festival takes place.

The Apple Does Not Fall Far From the Tree

So, what happened was this. Back in 1809, a little girl called Mary Ann planted some apple seeds from some apples being prepared by her mum. One of these pips grew into a seedling too big for its pot and got transported to the garden. Time moved ahead and the cottage ended up being sold to a Mr Bramley. The tree grew and grew. A cross-pollination occurred resulting in a large and extraordinary apple. Years later, in 1856 Mr Henry Merryweather went and tasted Mr Bramley’s apples from his tree and was taken aback by them. Merryweather took some grafts from the tree to grow in his nurseries. Over the next few years, the apple began to win awards from the RHS, and the Botanical Society. By 1896, Merryweather had 350,000 fruit trees.

During the 1900’s the apple was used as a useful food source during the First World War.

In 1924, when Merryweather was 86 years old he was visited by Garden Illustrated. He told them, “If you plant one apple, only let it be Bramley’s. A good tree of Bramley’s Seedling will pay the rent of a cottage.”

The apple is now international and famous worldwide with big producers in Japan who actually have a Bramley apple fan club. Whilst attending the festival they had a Japanese Tik-Tokker filming for a live audience. I tried to bomb it in the background. The Bramley apple is widely used in all sorts of culinary loveliness: for juice, Mr Kipling cakes, cider, and all manner of applesome bakery.

A Stone From the Hand of a Friend is an Apple

I met and spoke with Roger Merryweather, ex-high-sheriff and great-grandson of Henry Merryweather. What a very pleasant gentleman. He told me the Bramley story and gave me a book.  He also told me how a request was made to the Chapter of Southwell Minster to have a Bramley Apple Tree stained glass window installed to commemorate these events. The design was based on the Tree of Life and was installed in 2009, to celebrate 200 years of the Bramley Apple in Southwell. 

“No wonder, for if Eden’s apple gave the world sorrows, Southwell’s brought it only wholesome delight.” The Daily Telegraph. 

After this, I walked around the market town and witnessed every shop taking part in the festival and displaying apples in their windows.

Or yummy apple-tisers!

What a wonderful, wholesome event. It’s given me an idea for a book.

And now, I leave you with the Bramley Apple song. Yes, there’s a song. This is how we enjoy things.