Satirical snapshots bringing you whimsy on a wednesday.
Word up
Iβm part of a collective that share word of the day with each other in order that we can all become walking, spouting lexicons.
It doesnβt really work very well for me being a down to earth kind of girl who tells it how it is and finds layman terms gets better results, however, I play along as resident wordsmith.
The word the other day was βDaedalβ
The object of the word group is to then put said word into a sentence or two proving to the rest of the group that you fully comprehend its meaning. Β Whatevs.
One of the group members chose to call me that day using the word daedal in an outrageous display of boastfulness.
βYouβre pronouncing it incorrectly,β I said.
βNo Iβm not, actually.β
β OK.β
So, later that day when I knew theyβd have been fully over using it in public I sent the person a YouTube video of the correct pronunciation. Like Iβd told them. This was the response.
Well, how ungrateful. My apologies for having an extensive vocabulary that clearly supersedes yours. I understand how you must covet the daedal workings of my superior mind.
Smart arses don’t wash with me (unless itβs me being one) as my friend Masher will testify here. Lest we forget.
Talking of men and their games
Breaking news guys. MAN FLU IS REAL.
This means you can fully get out of your Christmas shopping and other things you donβt want to do because your sniffly little cold is truly, seriously debilitating. You may show this evidence to your other half and know that you will stillΒ get no sympathy whatsoever.
But, there is an answer.
Unless your other half is in fact a doctor and sheβs had it up to here with your whingeing. Then sheβll be able to kill you and get away with it by citing a crime passionnel.
On the subject of French
Je mβappelle Juliette. But this girl on Facebook is called Gemma.
I have spent days and days sniggering at this. Because. Iβm. A. Child.
On other European news
What can I say? Christmas markets are off the agenda. My heartfelt sympathy goes out to those and their families in Berlin who lost their lives or were injured in this recent attack.
I got this card from someone the other day.
Iβve forwarded it to Angela Merkel. I hope she likes it.
Tidings of comfort and joy
See you all next week when itβs all done and dusted! Iβm still collecting for the AM fund so please feel free to open your hearts and give generously. Sharing is caring.
I wish each and every reader and friend out there a very Merry Christmas and hope it is filled with love, happiness and peace along with a dollop of glee and a large slice of joy.
JS x
31 Comments on Christmas Sign Off
Janet Janovich
21st Dec, 2016 17:12
Merry Christmas Jules?βοΈβοΈ And have a Happy New Year??ββ€οΈ??
Jules Smith
21st Dec, 2016 18:12
A very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and yours Janet! <3 I hope you are filled with happiness and surrounded by love. Give everyone at Int'l Cowboy Church a big, tight and super long hug from me. X
Hardnox
21st Dec, 2016 18:12
Hi Jules,
Greeting from the Colonies.
Have a wonderful Christmas Holiday and a smooth ride into the new year. 2017 looks to be a promising one as a new dawn approaches. I haven’t been this optimistic in a very long time. Here’s hoping a semblance of sanity returns to the world, if only a little bit.
Thanks for your visits to ‘Nox & Friends. Your wit is always appreciated.
Jules Smith
21st Dec, 2016 18:12
Hello Hardnox! Thanks for coming to play!
And thank you for appreciating my humour – that proves you are a gent with impeccable taste; being appreciated is a good thing.
I am honoured to be part of your cool group of pals at ‘Nox & Friends.
Let’s raise a toast to a shining new dawn! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you and yours.
goatman
21st Dec, 2016 20:12
Over the river and thru the woods βͺβ«β« (hope granny is there — else party, party).
Jules Smith
22nd Dec, 2016 10:12
Hey, Goatman!
I love that poem! Let’s hope Granny is out!
Wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas!
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11th Feb, 2017 15:02
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11th Feb, 2017 20:02
ChΓΒ o Linh, chÑ»⹠cΓΒ³ liΓΒͺn hÑ»①vÑ»βΊi em ΓβΓ‘Β»Ζ hΓ°Ñ»βΊng dѺ«n cΓΒ‘ch thÑ»©c nhѺΒn giѺ£i nhΓΒ°ng em khΓΒ΄ng nghe mΓΒ‘y. Em check mail vΓΒ lΓΒ m theo hΓ°Ñ»βΊng dѺ«n cÑ»§a chÑ»⹠nhΓΒ©. CѺ£m ΓΒ‘n em.
LSP
21st Dec, 2016 20:12
Gemma. Hahahahahahahaha!! It’s been on my mind, such as it is, too…
NICE CARD.
Jules Smith
22nd Dec, 2016 10:12
I know, right?! Gemma! Hahahahahahahahahahaha.
Thanks, LSP, and…. wishing you and the Dallas crew a fabulous Christmas and a Happy New Year! π
Got any vera’s?
Masher
21st Dec, 2016 21:12
Thanks a bunch, Jules, you rotten cow! I’d almost managed to forget that!
Almost.
Anyhoo, I hope you have a smashing Christmas and a fantabulous New Year!
xx
Jules Smith
22nd Dec, 2016 10:12
Hahahaha! You’re welcome, Masher. I’ll never let you forget!
Happy Christmas and a joyous New Year, petal. Make sure you buy the current Mrs. Masher just what she wants or I’m sending her a whip!
LL
22nd Dec, 2016 11:12
Merry Christmas!
Jules Smith
22nd Dec, 2016 13:12
And a Merry Christmas to you too, Larry and a Happy New Year! π
Gorilla Bananas
22nd Dec, 2016 13:12
Should we find Gemma Pell a French boyfriend, Jules? My instinct tells me it’s possible for a Frenchman to fall in love with a name. She should still cut her fringe and put on some make-up, of course. Make the most of what you’ve got, as we say in the jungle.
You’re less likely to die if your doctor is a woman because women have cooler fingers than men. This is a fact – look it up if you don’t believe me!
I know you’ll have a merry one, Jules. How could you not?
Jules Smith
22nd Dec, 2016 13:12
Yes, Mr. Gorilla Bananas. I know enough French boys! Ha! Maybe I need to take her to a French party? It takes seven years to get through the door just saying hello. Think of the fun she’d have! Oh how I’d laugh…
They do? Icy fingers? I am going to look that up because you haven’t told me why…. Freezing Falanges.
I will do my best and the very same to you, most loyal and gracious gorilla! Have an absolute blast. π
Exile on Pain Street
22nd Dec, 2016 19:12
My Subaru got cracked up and I’ve spent the last three days car shopping. None of the models I’m considering look ANYTHING like what you’ve posted above. I’d like a nice midlife crisis set a wheels and a Japanese girlfriend half my age named Yum Yum but something tells me I’m going to end up with a Toyota and falling asleep in front of the TV. Such is life.
Merry Christmas, dear. Nice to meet ‘cha.
Jules Smith
24th Dec, 2016 19:12
You never know, M, there might be a Japanese 23 year old driving round the streets of NYC right now looking for a guy having a midlife crisis. Things like this DO happen.
Merry Christmas to you too and back atcha kiddo! π
The Blue Grumpster
22nd Dec, 2016 20:12
Wait a minute… my doctor’s a guy. So now I’m gonna die…. (notice the excellent rhyme) sooner? I knew it!
Gemma Pell… That’s so great. Good thing I can be Randy day and night, night and day without any French citizen knowing what the hell’s so funny about that.
All I can say is Angela Merkel should feel honored to receive a card from you.
P.S. Speaking of men and women, would you believe me if I told you my last post led to some green person’s comment that said I am… a misogynist? How rude!
Jules Smith
24th Dec, 2016 20:12
You will live forever, Blue. Trust me.
haha! The French may know that well but never understand.
Who dared to say that?! I shall go find them and give them a verbal slapping! TCH!
Happy Christmas my Blue friend π
The Blue Grumpster
27th Dec, 2016 21:12
I hope yours was as good as mine. :))
Jules Smith
28th Dec, 2016 18:12
Lets compare notes. π
Hazel
23rd Dec, 2016 00:12
Someone?
Jules Smith
24th Dec, 2016 19:12
Someone AKA the best friend ever! π
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11th Feb, 2017 16:02
yeke…..kalu gitu aku yg. silap…sorrylah….Bujang x baca habis…….lagi pun aku x sihat, baru ok. sikit ni……bujang kena denggi…….Ni darah dah ok.
the late phoenix
23rd Dec, 2016 02:12
* i have seasonal affective disorder. it lasts for four seasons.
* i always feel for Daedalus. raising a son ain’t easy.
* i’d like a female doctor…
* my name is Name
my name is my slave name
my name is Snoop Doggy Dogg
my name is Slim Shady
my name is Phoenix
* happy christmas, my beloved! i write stories on instagram so i’m afraid i can’t get you anything…
*)
Jules Smith
24th Dec, 2016 19:12
Ha! It lasts for 4 seasons! I hear ya!
I always wondered where the real Slim Shady was…
A very happy Christmas, my sweet, may it bring you reprieve from SAD and lots of happy! *)
GruntOfMonteCristo
25th Dec, 2016 06:12
Merry Christmas, Jules! Thought of you and Mum when I passed through Nashville on Monday. Did you ever report on The Merchant restaurant when you were there?
Jules Smith
26th Dec, 2016 20:12
Merry Christmas, Grunt!
Yes! We went there – I sent you an e mail and pics of my dinner but I just checked and it hadn’t sent. DUH. It was delicious – good call! π
Matt Black
27th Dec, 2016 03:12
The more you shall honor Me,
the more I shall bless you.
-the Infant Jesus of Prague
(<- Czech Republic, next to Russia)
trustNjesus ALWAYS, dear,
and wiseabove to Seventh-Heaven…
cuzz the only other realm aint too cool.
God bless your indelible soul.
Google+: kold_kadavr _flatliner
Jules Smith
28th Dec, 2016 18:12
Cheers Matt. Giving that some thought.
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