Whimsy on a Wednesday bringing you Bacon, Bars, and Bunnies!

The most wonderful thing I heard on the news this week was that the Brits have voted the good ole bacon butty as their favourite comfort food. With everything else that is going wrong in this country, it’s good to see we know about food – even though the rest of the world think we don’t. Particularly the French, but as I have argued with the French before, you can’t serve cold English custard, give it a fancy pants name, and think you can get away with it. Non, mes amies. 

Talking of French…

I watched the Napoleon movie the other evening and rather enjoyed that. I think Joaquin Phoenix lends himself well to these despot roles. A very good actor, in my opinion. I also think his cleft lip adds a certain gravitas to his appearance. 

Talking of gravitas…

I had the gumption to do a pen and wash of Ye Olde Trip To Jerusalem. An ancient inn, the oldest in England, where Richard the Lionheart and his men headed off on the crusades. 

Along with  this piece I wrote about the renowned, cursed galleon that sits in this pub.  Legend has it that the wooden model was a gift from a sailor. It used to dangle, collecting dust that hung eerily from its plates. Someone went to clean it one day and met an untimely demise. The next two people who dared to handle the galleon both came to a mysterious end!  After a bit of consideration a spiritualist came along and popped the artefact inside a glass box away from those with OCD.  People come in here  for a traditional ale, a go at the old game of ringing the bull, and a bit of medieval solace away from the drone of the modern world. You don’t need the stress of a cursed ship ruining your bevvy. 

Talking of oddities…

What if the White Rabbit wasn’t late?

The White Rabbit, instead of fretting about time, sauntered leisurely through fields of very yellow daisies. Each petal exhaled a puff of glitter sending Rabbit into fits of giggles.

Stumbling upon the Mad Hatter’s peculiar tea party, he found Alice sipping tea with her pinky finger sticking out at an absurd angle. The Mad Hatter, wearing a hat made of upside-down teacups, exclaimed, “Ah, the White Rabbit! How punctual of you to be fashionably late!”

The Red Queen, reclining on a throne of playing cards, shouted, “Off with his watch if he’s not late! Oh, wait, he’s not late. Never mind!”

The Cheshire Cat grinned from ear to invisible ear, offering cryptic wisdom, “Time is merely a suggestion, my dear Rabbit. Embrace the art of tardiness in a wonder of timelessness.”

As the party unfolded, teacups turned into marching band instruments, playing a tick-tock melody that made the Dormouse tap dance on the table. Alice, contemplated the non-linearity of time and asked the Cheshire Cat, “Is it possible to be fashionably early in Wonderland?”

The Cheshire Cat replied, “Time bends like a curious caterpillar here. You’re neither early nor late; you’re precisely when you should be.”

And so, in the eternal afternoon of Wonderland, the White Rabbit and his eccentric companions revelled in the joy of timeless moments. The only rush was to enjoy every absurdity and laughter that echoed through the hills.

There’s a question. And here’s another one…